Chapter 139
1508words
“Yes…You’re the worst Alpha I have ever seen!”
Della’s affirmation endlessly echoed through my ears like a broken record. And each time, it’s like a sharp knife being pierced into my heart.
With heavy steps and a bleeding heart, I left Della’s house and met the cold breeze and raindrops outside amidst the storm.
“The old Della? You’ve killed her yourself long ago, Kylian!”
All along, I had my hopes up. Hope that she still loves me and that we’ll still be together one day.
But it all got shuttered into pieces with such that one sentence. I thought I could mend her heart and all the pain I brought her, but in the end, it's all still just an empty hope.
I stood frozen in the middle of the field, oblivious to my surroundings. Looking up to the sky and letting the rain drench me, I clenched my chest to lessen the pain that was excruciating all over me.
Mixed in the rain was the one thing no one could ever see me with – tears.
“It shouldn’t have ended up like this,” I whispered in pain.
Flashing before my eyes were all the moments when Della willingly went on a dare with me and all those days that she made a great effort to care for the pack. Most importantly, those intimate lovemakings we shared.
If not a proof of her loving me, what’s that all about? Just a show? A form of revenge?
I was so naive that I thought I had impressed Della.
I dreamed of us being together, happily living just like how we used to be before Flora came into the picture. A day where she’ll just be mine forever.
I pictured as being on the lawn of our house playing with our pups. I’ll be training them to be a strong man while Della will lovingly watch us and cook us dinner.
But how did things end up so differently?
Every step I took to be closer to her seemed to have brought me further. How pathetic.
All my hopes for the future got shuttered just like that.
I feel so weak and broken. I didn’t know how long I walked back, but it seemed like an eternity when my room was just a few walks from her house.
Drenched in the rain and dripping with water, I entered the pack house, oblivious to everyone who was staring at me. My wolf was roaring in rage and sorrow cause he was challenged by an omega she-wolf. He was angry with me for letting this happen.
I passed by a team of omegas who took the freshly washed clothes to send them to the ranked members' room.
‘That’s what omegas should do! Instead of insulting us!” My wolf yelled and I pushed him back and went straight to my room.
I let my foot leave footprints of water on the floor as I walked slowly toward the wine cabinet and grabbed a bottle of Romanee-Conti 1945 before going straight for the bathroom to soak myself in a warm bath.
Letting the warm water relax my body wasn’t enough to lessen my heart's swelling. Pulling the cork with my teeth, I drank it like water, letting the burning sensation flow in my throat.
I kept drinking until my stomach bulged into fullness. Inverting the bottle, I found it already empty. In annoyance, I threw it aside against the other wall, where it shattered into hundreds of shards like my heart.
Hopeless and powerless, I slid further deep down the bath until my head dipped beneath the water.
I had my eyes closed and my breaths would cause a formation of bubbles on the tub.
“What the fuck are you doing?” My wolf, burning with fury, shouted at me.
But I was too drained to even debate with him.
I never felt like this before. It’s as though I’m a candle that’s at its last centimeter of wick and about to die.
I remained quiet while he kept on scolding me, “How dare you let a mere chosen mate disrespect us like that! We’re an alpha! No one, especially not an omega like her, has the right to belittle us!”
My eyes suddenly opened, and the reflection of gold and brown reflected on the water as my wolf and I fought for dominance. My nails elongated, piercing through my palm as I formed my hand into a fist.
He wanted to gain control and punish Della for what he did.
“No!” I shouted back.
“No? Are you still going to protect her after what she said? You made her who she is right now! She should be grateful that she’s lucky enough to have you fall for her, or she’ll never be our Luna even if she begs with her life!”
I sat up from the tub, letting the water drip into my chest and have some of it splashed on the tiles below.
“You spoiled her too much! She even dared to challenge your identity as an Alpha! Our identity!”
“Stop it already!” This time, I shouted as I punched my hand against the nearby wall, letting the tiles break and my knuckles bleed.
I didn’t want to hear his words anymore, endlessly repeating the cause of my pain.
Standing, I put on my bathrobe and grabbed another bottle of wine before I went back to look at myself in the mirror, talking to my wolf.
After gulping a huge chunk of wine, I told him, “It’s all my fault. I caused all of this.”
I bitterly laugh. “I thought I could control everything and force her to stay with me for the rest of our lives. When in truth, all decision lies on her.”
Placing down the bottle on the sink, I stared at myself, looking deep into my eyes as if to see my own wolf. “Although Della is just an omega, she’s a strong and independent she-wolf, which is why I admire her so much. She has the character and determination of a powerful Luna.”
I remember how she stood up at the voting meeting and fought for her opinion. “Once she makes a decision, that will be it. And right now… she decided to give up on me.”
“You’ve killed her yourself long ago, Kylian!” Her words once again rang in my ear.
With another gulp of wine, I repeated with remorse, “It’s all my fault.”
Seconds. Minutes. Hours. I didn’t know how long had passed. But when Henry entered my room after numerous unanswered knocks, I was drunk as hell while sitting on the cold floor with countless bottles scattered on the floor.
He looked at me with so much shock before cautiously walking near me. He bent down and looked me in the eyes, asking with worry, “Alpha, what happened to you? Why are you so drunk?” he asked, gently taking the empty bottle in my hands.
Henry held my arm and shoulder, helping me up to stand, but with drunkenness, I could only put all my weight on him.
“Please, Alpha, you need to control yourself. Everyone in the pack has felt your wolf’s rage.” He told me, but I couldn’t care less right now.
He made me sit on the bed, and held both my shoulders, forcing me to look at his eyes filled with determination. “You need to be strong. For the entire pack.”
My shoulder trembled, and I let out a bitter smile as I pounded on my heavy chest. “It’s over! It’s completely over.”
“What is?” he asked with a furrowed eyebrows.
“Della abandoned me.” I laughed bitterly. “It’s like she ripped out a piece of my heart, making me lose control over my wolf. I… We… It’s hard to accept. How can we go on now?”
Suddenly, Henry’s eyes darkened. “It’s because of Della again?”
Fury was evident in his voice. With a clenched jaw and pursed lips, he said, “You should pull yourself together. Just let her be, and don’t let her make you fall into depression! You can’t ignore your pack members because of a lowly omega.”
Immediately, I stared at him. While pointing a finger, I told him, “You! Don’t you dare belittle her? I know you know me well being you are my Beta. But you don’t know how much I love her. And now she’s gone, and it's all because of me.”
Henry furrowed his eyebrows and looked at me with great confusion. Then, he took a deep breath and patted my shoulder. “Don’t worry, I’ll solve this. I’ll find a way to make her change her mind,” he said with conviction before he turned around and left.
A glimmer of hope flashed in my eyes when I heard my Beta's words. But that didn’t even last a second because my heart swelled up again, knowing that it would be hard to change it after Della made up her mind.
Once again, I was engulfed with despair… and only a small glint of hope.
