Chapter 54
1529words
“I guess this is my stop,” I said when we arrived at my gate and turned to him, and he smiled,
“I guess. Send my regards to Axel. It’s been a while since we had a guy’s day out. I’ll do my best to make time for more soon enough.”
I nodded but didn’t try to leave the car, instead, I stared out the window for what seemed an inappropriate amount of time, before William said something,
“Is there a problem, Em?”
I blew out a breath before finally turning to him,
“Are we going to pretend as though there is none?”
“It might help to be a little bit more elaborate.”
I looked at him in exasperation. I knew what he was doing. I didn’t like it, but I understood it. Even respected it.
“I don’t like the silence we drove in,” I said. I knew I was being unfair, because what else did I expect?
Did I really think he would jump for joy after seeing me with Paris? Considering what I knew?
“Maybe it’s because I don’t really know what to say.” He said gently, “What really could I say? Ember, how could you? What made you do it? You should know better?”
“Those sound very fitting if you ask me, and at this point, anything is welcome. Hopefully the truth. You can even scold me and call me dumb for making bad choices.”
He actually chuckled at that one
“I’m not about to call you dumb for having feelings or even hormones.”
“Hormones,” I murmured and shook my head. Was that all it was? All it had ever been?
No, I knew better.
“Listen, Em. If it weren’t for the man being a complete Arse, you both would still be together. The both of you would still be in love, and happy. I know that. So I don’t expect you to suddenly hate him. I don’t expect you to suddenly not feel something when he is close. It’s why… it’s why I’d rather he didn’t come close to you at all.” He dragged a hand down his hair and his frustration was absolutely clear.
“And now, because of those mixed feelings, I went ahead and decided to partner with him.”
“And I guess the youths factor in this as well.”
“Yes, the youths,” I said and sighed, knowing I was merely lying to myself. It wasn’t merely the youths. It had never been merely only the youths.
He took my hand as he had earlier and brought it to his lips,
“I’ll wait for you, Em. As long as I have to.”
“What if I never come out of this shadowed love? What if I’m one of those women who should know better, but never actually live better?”
“I don’t know as far as there, but I’m willing to be patient.”
“But for how long?” I couldn’t make a good man wait on me to act right. Not even if I knew that the man could be everything I needed. Especially not when the man was William. William deserved every beautiful thing.
“For as long as I can, I guess.” He said with a shrug, “I’m not exactly in a hurry, I know you need time, and I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m a pretty patient guy.”
I smiled despite myself and then shook my head,
“I may not be worth it.”
“You’re in every part and every way worth it.”
My lower lip wobbled and I had to fight the tears that stung my eyes,
“Be my friend, William.” I said and hugged him aggressively, “I couldn’t truly use a friend.”
“I’m already your friend, Em.” He said, running a hand down my hair, “Your very best friend.”
~~~
Ashley came to visit the next day.
It was the weekend and her visit was timely because I really did have a lot to tell her about, well, everything.
“You’ll sleep until noon if you’re left to it,” Ashley announced, and I opened one eye, gave her the stink eye, and closed it back
“What do you want?” I asked, my voice muffled against my pillow,
“To see if you’re still breathing.”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” I turned my face so I was looking at her and she shrugged before sitting at the foot of the bed,
“I heard about the meeting.”
“Oh.” I said and frowned, “but how? I haven’t said a word yet.”
“Pfft. I’ve got ears everywhere.”
“Of course you do,” I said and began to get up,
“So, are you okay?”
I thought about joking around but decided it was not what I needed at the moment.
“I’m not exactly sure how I feel, to be honest. In the beginning, my anxiety was that my father and Paris would be in the same room. The man does not exactly like Paris.”
“An understatement.”
“But then William called and asked if he could come. I could not tell him no. I felt guilty that it had been ages since we saw each other because of my work.”
“Ages?” Ashley asked, lifting a brow,
“A while.”
“So you let him come and it went south?”
“Funny how it didn’t go south during the meeting, but rather after.”
“Do tell.”
“He found me kissing Paris.”
I watched her mouth drop open and pressed my lips together,
“Now what led to that?”
“ I don’t know. I don’t know.” I said sadly, “One minute, I’m telling Paris to stay away from me because I only wished to discuss work with him, then the very next, his arms around me, and I’m not pushing him away.”
“William must have been devastated.”
“He didn’t say. He actually didn’t say anything throughout the journey home. And even when he did, it was because I had kept luring words out of him.”
“And how do you feel? About him seeing the both of you? I know there was something growing between you two.”
“Honestly? It’s unsettling. You’re right about there being something between the both of us. Now, I don’t know how that can possibly be since I’m still wrapped around the man I asked him to help me get a divorce with.”
“He was going to help with that, wasn’t he?” Ashley said wistfully and shook his head,
“Yeah.” I said and pondered for a moment. “You think that’s over now?”
“I think the both of you are the only ones who can genuinely answer that. But I think..It’s not easy to see the girl You have feelings for smooching her husband.”
“He’s not my husband.”
“He hasn’t signed the papers yet, so technically, he kind of still is.”
I pressed my lips together and groaned,
“About this though, how is the divorce going?”
I poured and shook my head,
“Unsuccessful. Paris won’t sign.”
“But you were adamant once before.”
“What do you mean once before?”
“I mean, you don’t seem to be chasing after your divorce now.”
“Oh, believe me, I’ve chased it. Even to the point of watching his beta chew up my papers.”
“So you just let go?”
I sighed and shook my head, “let’s say, I’m taking a break.”
“A break. Could it be that you’re taking this break, because somewhere deep down, you may still be in love with him?”
“That’s impossible.” I said and shook my head, “It’s not possible, Ash.”
But she looked at me like she knew better,
“I’m taking a break because I’m tired of chasing him at the moment. He’s very stubborn.”
“He is. So is your love for him.” She said simply and I shook my head,
“No, not a chance.”
“Yeah right.” She said and made herself comfortable in my bed, “you tell yourself that. My only sadness is for William at this point. The poor guy lost you before he very even had you”
~~~
Ashley’s words stayed with me through the weekend, and I found myself thinking of it even when Monday came, paused during work hours, only to ponder them again on my way back.
I blame my distracted thoughts for being the reason I did not pay attention to the men who waited for me when I got to the quiet alley.
“Hi, sweet thing. Where are you going in a hurry at a time like this?”
“You wouldn’t be interested in saying hello to new friends?”
I looked at the the three men with irritation,
“I see you all have no better thing to do with your time. Don’t mess with mine.”
The laughed like fools and i wondered if all of this was because word had gotten out about my youth empowerment project. I expected it, but not this early. But early or not, I was not interested in their rubbish and and made to walk past them when one grabbed me by my collar,
“The missus said you were an arrogant little thing. Quite fascinating to see it for
Myself.”
What missus? I questioned internally.
“You’ll let me go if you know what’s good for you.”
The men howled like hyenas only serving to
Make me angry,
“Have it your way then,” I said angrily.
