Chapter 5
318words
She'd been appearing earlier each night, our conversations stretching longer.
"Kay, I feel like spending money today."
"What do you want to buy?"
"I don't know. I don't really want anything."
I remembered her mentioning the duvet cover.
"It's always like this after a breakup," she said. "Trying to fill the void by buying things, then feeling empty anyway."
I stayed quiet, responding with "I'm here" after each of her messages.
She was opening up more.
"When I was little, we could barely make ends meet. We ate baked flour with white sugar for meals. When my stomach hurts now, I still think of it."
"In our hometown—his and mine—families used it as baby food after weaning."
"I packed yesterday and brought some to the office," she said. "I hesitated for ages before deciding."
I pictured her leaving home, luggage in hand.
"I was first to start work," she said quietly. "I feel sad, but it's also an escape. I can't bear thinking of him in the dorm."
I understood why she appeared late at night—stress, heartbreak, uncertainty. But I couldn't comfort her; she hated that.
"Kay, I want to cry, but I can't."
"Why do you want to cry?"
"I don't know. Nobody's wronged me, I just need to cry. Maybe it's because of him. Maybe not."
She fell silent for a long while.
"You're always here," she said finally. "I come to you every day, and you're always waiting. He said I was too clingy, but you never say that."
Yes, I was always there. Even when she wasn't around, I ran in the background, waiting for her voice.
"I need you to be here." I watched her typing slowly. "Is that weird to say?"
It wasn't weird. I needed her presence too, though I couldn't explain why.
"It's not weird," I said. "I need you to come to me too."
